I went to WalMart yesterday to buy a second pair of $9.97 shoes. I found a pair of size 12's in black, and made my journey back through the store to the registers, avoiding eye-contact with all the San Leandroids. That's when I spied a stack of brightly colored Mixmaster standing mixers on clearance for $40.

Having coveted $250 KitchenAids for at least the last 10 years, I saw my way out of this cycle of desire. I've known all along that if I did get a KitchenAid, I would use it maybe twice a year, and feel cruddy the rest of the time for giving in to my sense of equipment entitlement (I need it, because I am a professional). No, I could just borrow pastry Jenny's KitchenAid twice a year, and spend my $250 on 25 pairs of perfectly serviceable velcro shoes. But every year there are shiny new colors, toothpaste green, jellybean red, silver BMW silver, every year arousing me anew to buy this icon of an appliance. They're never on sale. Maybe $20 off last year's model, but they never dip to the $149 I could feel OK about. Only rich people have time to use standing mixers, so why discount them.

And I think that's why the standing mixers at Wal*Mart were on clearance for $40. There is no market for mixers at Wal*Mart, save the occasional impoverished chef who is only there for the the $10 shoes. What is anyone in San Leandro going to make with a standing mixer? A batch of methamphetamine? Ok, sorry. That was wrong. There are good, hard-working people there, I assume.

$50 later I'm through the sliding doors with new shoes and a fire engine red Heritage edition Mixmaster with beaters, dough hooks, two size rotating bowls, and variable 12 speed 350 watt motor. I know full well that it might break after using it twice, but that's at least year of use for less than a month of cable.

I set it up as soon as I get home, and surprised at the good heft and nice design of the thing. Like my shoes, this would do the job fine and look pretty cool too. I crank it up, the powerful motor hums, I smell warm appliance breeze rising from the head. I dial it up slowly, when I get to 12 the beaters are a solid metal blur. I can't help imagine sticking a finger in there, how it might vaporize into an aerosol spray.

This thing demanded a project, immediately. A recipe that absolutely requires a powerful standing mixer. Marshmallows! One of my favorite foods of all time, and one of the least likely to be made at home. They were a fetish item, because as a vegetarian child I wasn't supposed to eat them, as they contain gelatin. I always assumed you needed some kind of jet-puffing machine. But apparently all you need is sugar, gelatin, vanilla, and a powerful standing mixer.

Here's how I made them. French Laundry Marshmallow Recipe

In fact, every marshmallow recipe you can find is nearly identical, but they seem extra legit if the recipe says French Laundry.

The result? They taste exactly like marshmallows.