My diary delinquincy is worse than I realized. I should maybe just spare you the pageload and throw in the towel. Except I suspect that as with an exercise regime, there will come a time when I get back into it and realize how good it is for me and how much I liked it.

It's also possible that like a reconciled romance I will realize in two weeks why I was so frustrated in the first place. And bored. And feeling like I already did my best and there's no sense in dragging it out.

I should offer you some non-meta news.

I am a few months into my non-titled new role as sometimes sous chef, sometimes frustrated line cook. I am doing well and enjoy the change. I do miss Sat-Sun weekend, but that will come around again. I am not dating anyone, and like every time I'm not dating anyone it feels like I will never date anyone again, where will I find him, and even if I do, will he have Monday and Tuesday off? Jeez. I have no cat. I still have 10 fish. I have a mouse who was feeding on my bean-paintinged IKEA CD towers now stashed in the back of my closet (I am also now largely post-CD. MP3 or vinyl, thanks).

I have a new BB gun that looks exactly like the one the good guy in No Country for Old Men takes off one of the dead drug dealers. A Colt Delta Elite Gold Cup. I invented this game where one person controls a remote-controlled helicopter, and the other shoots at it with a BB gun.

I spent thanksgiving with my dear coworker Ross, and my ex-coworker Eloise, and all their friends, and all their boyfriends and girlfriends. It was fun, but I felt old and single.

Most of my weekend hanging out involves Sara Elberg, Laura, Ross, Eloise and Nat, Paul Berglund, and my neighbors.

I am in a book club of two with Ross. We read "The Orchard Keeper" by Cormac McCarthy (see No Country for Old Men). We are now reading "Then We Came to the End" by Joshua Ferris, about an ad agency going through layoffs after the dot.com bust.

I am generally happy. Sometimes lonley. Gratefully healthy. I miss too many people to list. But right now especially I miss Jenny and Mattson, and Owen, and a little bit Ari.